Going to the Gyno

My first doctors appointment is tomorrow. I really hate the gyno and I’m sure I can detail why I hate it more fully after my appointment tomorrow. Today is just the dread and anticipation. Let’s see if I can make a complete ass out of myself tomorrow.

(Please let me remember to shave my legs and lady bits!)

Anyway.

I figured out the fat thing

I had always told myself that I was not going to be one of those fat-ass pregnant pigs that eat everything in sight and gain 60 pounds. Of course, I have somehow fucked my life up to the point that anything I have ever thought I would never do has happened. So why not this too?

I also expect, just so you know, that I will end up an old lady in a wheel chair, wearing Depends, my hearing aid and bifocals. Just because I can’t see myself having to deal with any of that either.

The test says yes

Not something that I planned on or was ready for. I don’t know how my husband screwed this up so royally. The only time that I had been on any kind of birth control in the last 10 years was when I initially married my husband. For a year. Until I ran out.

Other than that, pull and pray. For the most part. I’d like to say I was super awesome and used condoms…

I’m not ready to grow up!

And I never will be. I can sit here and wish I was 20 for the rest of my life, but that obviously isn’t going to happen. So I just have to suck it up and deal, right?

I made the not-so-fun decision to move in with my husband again. No more dating fun, meeting random people off the internet and whatnot for me.

I also realized (remembered) that (all? some?) men are stupid.

I think I’ve figured out the marriage thing

If you ask me, there really aren’t any good reasons to get married. I would know, I’ve done it. It’s boring, you get into a rut and take each other for granted. You settle down, don’t really do anything anymore, have kids and life gets worse from there. Then instead of being somone, you are someone’s mom.

At least this had held true with my friends and my life.